On A Bed Of Soft Green Grass: 08/01/2003

You match Jess. Your tastes are similiar to Rory's,
with greater emphasis on punk and metal. You
also seem to enjoy making showtunes references.
'Fess up -- you really went back to New York to
star in a Broadway show, right?

Gilmore Girls: Whose musical taste do you have?
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Sam Cues

People like having you around; you're cheerful and
know what to say in any given situation. You
don't crave attention, but people notice you
anyway, and the more they get to know you, the
more they like you.

What song from Gilmore Girls are you?
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You know what song reminds me of Chad for some odd reason? This one:

Cry On Demand
by Ryan Adams

So, it's how the story goes.
And we come to the scene where I'm holding you close.
She moves, moves like a thin dulling blade
Cuts, all the words that I said.
The only difference is,
The only difference is,
The truth -
The truth is I miss you.

Cry on demand.
How'd you learn to?
Cry on demand.
Teach me if you want to.
Though you don't have to.
I just close my eyes and think of you.

Real. Real like a plastic bouquet.
That thrives on the smoke from an old fireplace.
And dies every night with her face on the news.
Nobody cries, they just smoke and stare and their shoes.
The only difference is,
The only difference is,
Nobody can cry -
It's hard to do.
For most folks, without a reason why.

Cry on demand.
How'd you learn to?
Cry on demand.
Why would you want to?
Just close your eyes and think of me.
I take back everything I said.
She can't hurt me, and I can't hurt you.
It's like were already dead.
Cry on demand.
Why would you want to?
Cry on demand.
Teach me if you want to.
Though you don't have to.
I just close my eyes and think of you.

Isn't this blend for Blendorama gorgeous?

I also just realized I forgot to show the add effects blend I made for Blendorama the other day.

Apparently I need to say more than just "I met Chad Murray!" So how about:

I met Chad Murray AND James Lafferty!

Still not good enough? Okay how about:

I met Chad Murray, James Lafferty and Hilarie Burton!

STILL not good enough? Okay fine. This better be:

I met Chad Murray, James Lafferty, Hilarie Burton, and a bunch of the other cast members when I was an extra yesterday! I got to hang out with them during scenes in which none of us were needed! It was Chad's birthday, so that was kind of cool. It sucked for him though, poor guy! He had to work all day (until midnight!) and he hurt himself (Busted open a vein in his leg, not pretty.) and when they ordered pizza all the other extras got to it before he could and wolfed it all down. Poor guy. Makes me wanna just cuddle him. Don't it you? He's so cuddle-able. Except he's also very manly because he swears lol. Except he kind of sounds like a kid going through puberty when he does. heh. Oh well. I met Lee Norris too, from Boy Meets World, he was a sweetie. He's cuddle-able too! So if James Lafferty. James Lafferty.... I wasn't that attracted to him by seeing the pictures and clips, but after yesterday. Oh yeah. He's a sweetie. I have a dream sequence I'd like to film with them! lol.

Oh well, maybe next week. ;)

I met Chad Murray!

I am so excited about that I also met a bunch of other stars from One Tree Hill, and they are some of the best people around I swear. Plus the guys have this tendancy to be really cute lol.

I quit that job...

But anyways, not the point... the point is:

Gilmore Girls Season 4 Trailer

New blend for Happily Ever After

For hating it, and not wanting it, I'm pretty good at this job.

I must be going crazy.
All these voices in my head.
I got one like a devil on my shoulder.
This is what it said.
"Can you look me in the eye, and tell me that you're happy now?"
It sounds suspiciously like Michelle Branch.

I'm literally starting to feel sick about this whole thing. It's driving me batty and I'm about to break. There's a me inside of me, an inner voice if you will. It's becoming white noise because it's screaming. The inner me is well actually inner me can say multiple things at once, isn't it lucky. Mostly it's SCREAMING. But it's also saying things like "No No No No NOOOOOOOOOOOOO." and "I don't want to." Inner me is TERRIFIED and Inner me is throwing quite the impressive little tantrum. Fortunately outer me is good at hiding inner me. Although Inner me is starting to make me sick to my stomach. My stomach, feels like a roller coaster. God I think I'm gonna throw up. Good thing Mom's gonna inquire at her office about a possible job for me tomorrow.

I made a new blend for Inspired:

I don't like realizing I'm fucked. (not literally of course.) Because that's what I am. Fucked.

Well, that's not entirely true. After Monday I will most likely be fucked. Royally. Screwed beyond belief. Why?

Because I have a crap job I start Monday. I don't want it, I hate that I took it (kind of.) I want a different one.

There's the rub!

See I also register for classes Monday. I planned on taking classes during the day. Because my job is 5pm-9pm. But, I hate my job (Are we seeing a trend?) I know you're thinking "How can you hate a job you haven't started?" Easy. 1) The job is stupid, mundane, simple, and telemarketing. 2) I've already (only recently) realized all I'll lose by having this job. So I want a job working in a medical office (If only my mother wasn't a BITCH I'd have one.) So I can only figure this out one way... Only register for afternoon classes. That way I can take afternoon classes and work 5pm til 9pm (Oh the fucking joy. This so blows.) This frees up my morning for interviews and a part time job at a medical office. So until I get part time job at medical office, my life blows. Once I get it I should be okay. Yeaaah.

Moving on from my crap life. I watched Abandon (Katie Holmes) tonight, it so wasn't how I thought it was. But in a good way I guess.

Moving on again. I'm now on the staff at One Tree Hill Online

I'm a little fuzzy because I'm soooooooo tired... so bear with me.

I woke up at 6:30am because I had to leave with mom and dad in order to be to the college by 8:30 to take my ASSET test. When I got there, I found out I'd read it wrong, and the test was at 2pm. (Don't ask.) So that sucked. Then while I was taking my test, dad decided that would be an oppourtune time to prowl the One Tree Hill on location area thingy where they were filming today.

Also, I had a mini-revelation/breakdown in the car tonight. I even started crying, because I suddenly realise I regret quiiting Food Lion. I know I'm going to hate my new job despite the increase in $. Because of it's hours (5-9pm.) There goes any chance of a life I ever thought of having. So in this last few days of freedom, I'm clawing at straws in an attempt to find a job I would rather have. (Secretarial. Receptionist. Preferably 8am-5pm in the Medical field.) Mom could have gotten me one if she spoke up, but she didn't want me working at the same place as her. Which I can see yes, but it'd have been nice if she'd have done it anyways and I could have kept looking. What I really want is this job I applied to in the paper. It's as a Part Time Receptionist working 8am-12pm. I could take classes in the afternoon/evening(maybe?) and be set. So please everyone, say a prayer, do a spell, make a wish, whatever the heck ya'll believe in and lend me some support and luck, because your dear friend, is soooo unhappy.